Spanish Tinder

Spanish Tinder

Hola, me again – still single, still dateless, marginally less obese than the last time I wrote and every bit as annoying. I probably shouldn’t give away such a big clue as to the effectiveness of my use of dating apps in the introductory sentence, but let’s face it, you are not reading this expecting me to have hooked up with a Spanish hottie in Spain, during a pandemic, are you? When the pandemic first struck, and lockdown ensued, Tinder…

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Bumbling On Bumble

Bumbling On Bumble

Well I haven’t been able to create too much content for this blog, given how exceptionally limited my interactions on dating apps are. And things are no easier in the Covid-19 era – I don’t think my attractiveness to women is any greater now they cannot even imagine to stroke my hairy nipples. I guess I should start with my profile before going on to reveal the exciting amount of interaction that I had. My Bumble Profile This time I…

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First Dates Application (2018)

First Dates Application (2018)

Well I’ve just updated my Bumble profile – decided not to undersell myself this time by writing about my small willy and calling myself a tosser, like I did on my Tinder profile. I’m not quite happy with it yet – it doesn’t scream “me” but it will do for now. Bumble only seems to want to offer me women in Barnet or Redbridge at the moment though. So whilst I’m waiting for enough action (or non-action) to happen to…

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Tinder Over…Next?

Tinder Over…Next?

So Tinder has been absolutely every bit as unproductive in getting a date as I expected it to be. I did get a few matches, but always got unmatched – normally before I even sent a message, though at least once I got unmatched after sending a message. Harsh but it is the world of online dating when you are aesthetically challenged. There were some interesting opportunities on there: And like, who the hell is she? “I don’t believe in…

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Tinder Update

Tinder Update

As promised, I have spent the last two weeks doing a lot of swiping. I think I have managed it every day – in a way it is boring, yet I can never get bored of looking at attractive women. Hot women made the recent heatwave bearable. I guess I should show you my profile first: Bored of the gym bro’s with big muscles and small brains, fist-pumping to the blandest tech-house, drinking protein shakes, eschewing personality and doing things…

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Introduction

Introduction

Hello. My name is James, I am nearly 40 years old and I’ve never had a proper girlfriend. This used to bother me 10-15 years ago. Nowadays I couldn’t give a fuck. Possibly literally but I’ve not had the opportunity to test that in recent years. I’m not exactly prime boyfriend material. I’m obese, unfit, fairly ugly (or at least weird looking), I have a hairstyle that people stare at, shit teeth, I have no house, car or appreciable savings….

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