Bumbling On Bumble

Bumbling On Bumble

Well I haven’t been able to create too much content for this blog, given how exceptionally limited my interactions on dating apps are.

And things are no easier in the Covid-19 era – I don’t think my attractiveness to women is any greater now they cannot even imagine to stroke my hairy nipples.

I guess I should start with my profile before going on to reveal the exciting amount of interaction that I had.

My Bumble Profile

This time I decided to take it a bit more seriously, trying to put across my good points without writing that I have a small nob in my profile:

I have never understood women, yet I don’t think I could be any more appealing than this to the opposite sex. Does that or does that not say, “I want his cock…and then to find out where to buy Viagra from”?

So the big reveal – guess how many matches I received? And I did a bulk of swiping most days for around 6-8 weeks.

Zero.

It doesn’t help that my expectations are way out of kilter with my own reality. I think all of these women were perfect for me:

Though not everyone is perfect for me…

Yeah not going to work that one.

Software is hot? Is this something many women think? Hmmm.

Also some others…guess which way I swiped?

I can confirm that my interests do not include upcycling. Though that is preferable to gym.

And next?

Dating apps are about as relevant as luggage shops now, however I have recently bought myself a suitcase so I might as well do a bit of swiping, especially now that I’ve lost a bit of weight and have started drinking beer once more.

Not that I have any new photos to show off my new only somewhat obese figure.

Seeing as Tinder passporting is free until the end of April – I have set my country range to EspaƱa. Two matches already. One is blatantly a fake profile and the other unmatched before I could say “hola”.

Adios.

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